i think it’s a sign that all is right with the world.
brilliant! i’ll make millions!
May 21, 2006 — welfareloserso i’m thinkin, with the huge market there is for alternative video game controllers – kongas, dance pads, microphones, steering wheels, eyetoy cameras, and the rumored lightsabers THAT I CAN’T WAIT TO GET MY FREAKIN HANDS ON (oh, i’ve got my costume ready, too… ooooo… need… lightsaber…) -
anyway. i was thinking there needs to be a Dance Dance Revolution: Stripper Pole Edition. i mean, if every frathouse in the country bought one – and they would – that’s a lot of damned money in my pocket.
ialsohaveadream had to burst that bubble by mentioning the fact that it would be crawling with sorority girls, which would not only make it impossible to keep clean and odor-free, but would also necessitate it being built of a prohibitively expensive alloy to support the weight. something wolverine-like.
did i mention i was never in a sorority?
the vacation will continue…
May 17, 2006 — welfareloseruntil i sober up, bitches.
sorry for the hiatus… i should be back and running my mouth daily by the second or third week of june. first came everybody’s MD graduation… then prm’s PhD graduation (both preceded and followed by several days of eating drinking and merry-making with friends and family) … then there was the weekend in kentucky with nodamnedsense’s family, with his sister smitingthewickedforminimumwage taking the brunt of our invasion by letting us sleep at her house… tomorrow is the erasure concert slutmonkey and i i have been looking forward to for months and months… then a weekend of watching the kids while positiverolemodel works his last four 12-hour ER shifts… in a row… killin my weekend! … then i suppose a week or so of particularly intense partying, a week of packing up all of our friends and sending them off (probably with amusing magnetic bumper stickers surreptitiously slapped onto their vehicles) … a week in our hometown with our parents…
then it should be back to my ongoing commentary on the excruciating minutiae of boring business as usual.
dancing queens!
May 4, 2006 — welfareloserokay, i wish i had figured out how much fun this was sooner. dance pad video games are FUN. they make me look even whiter than i am, but i’m as close to shameless as it gets without gaining 100 lbs and becoming a nudist. and lord, are they a workout. i sweat like crazy, i’m sore from my calves to my shoulders, and that’s on the freakin EASY level of MC Dance Groovz. okay. so it’s probably just due to the way i play… nah, better yet, i’ll blame it on my playing conditions rather than my playing form. sort of a toy-and-twit obstacle course. it’s a fisher-price mosh pit, really, given that i have to keep a couple of turds the heck off *my* dance pad (and hey, i’m not saying that bouncing them across the room is the nicest thing to do, but it’s best they learn NOW that i am competitive, before we start playing backyard football in a couple of years.)
i can’t wait for my dance dance revolution mario mix to show up in the mail… if they think dancing along to a silhouette of a raver is fun, just wait til we’re stomping koopas to the heavy beats of jessica simpson and n’sync…
note evilgremlin’s disinterest. the boy is down with the donkey konga… NOT down with the dancing. i asked him to play with me… he sat there and watched me and his brothers for a couple of minutes.
EG: actually, that really doesn’t look like any fun.
Me: dude. it’s just like twister.
EG: only not fun like twister.
Me: it is too fun.
EG: you’re not even smiling.
Me: i’m concentrating. it’s the same face i have when i play donkey konga, and that’s fun.
EG: you look like you’re going to fall down.
Me: i probably am.
EG: falling down is NOT fun.
Me: trying not to fall down might be. you don’t even know!
EG: the brothers are pushing each other.
Me: KNOCK THAT OFF!
EG: *suddenly perking up* wait, is this a fighting game? i like fighting games!
Me: no. it’s a dancing game. STOP PUSHING!
EG: it looks like a fighting game, though.
Me: it’s not a- GET YOUR HANDS OFF HIS NECK!
EG: i think spazmonkey won.
Me: he did NOT win, because he did not DANCE.
EG: how many points for knocking dramaqueen down?
Me: he did not get POINTS for – STOP THAT!
EG: oh, so he doesn’t get points because dramaqueen got back up?
Me: something like that.
EG: so is dramaqueen winning?
Me: *sigh* *I’M* winning, because *I’M* the only one dancing.
EG: actually, you’re just kinda stomping. *watching spazmonkey fly matrix-style across the room, pause to giggle, then slide in to tackle dramaqueen’s feet.* this is kinda like halo. without guns.
Me: yeah. wanna play?
EG: nah. i’ll wait til you turn this off and put in halo. can i use your stomper pad for halo instead of the mote control?
i finally convinced the twits that ice cream is good!
May 2, 2006 — welfarelosernot the cones… but the ice cream, at least… baby steps…
