Welfareloser's Blog

okay, living in big cities blows, as far as i’m concerned. you waste hours of your life every week in a car, you either live in a shithole or spend a ridiculous portion of your income on decent housing, and any basic leisure activity involves crowds of sardine-sheeple. fuck that.

denver at least has one awesome thing going for it… it’s close to tons of awesome fishing on all sides. we spent 5 days in denver.

thursday, west:

saturday, north:

sunday, south:

okay, you may have noticed by now that “east of denver” was not included. so i exaggerated when i said there was good fishing in EVERY direction; east of denver lie only sterile, nasty, un-fishy things like tumbleweeds. and kansas.

*all time not spent fishing was spent at one of the following brewpubs:
flying dog
breckenridge
rock bottom
wynkoop
avery

but we didn’t just fish and drink. we hung out with our buds, nodamnsense in denver:

and slutmonkey for three days in minnesota:

for your own peace of mind, it’s really best that you don’t ask too many questions about the above picture. yes, those ar e acrylic paints and canvases. yes, it is between midnight and 6 AM. and yes, that is underwear on positiverolemodel’s head. no, it’s not his. or mine.

also, we spent two days in our soon-to-be new home of iowa city, IA. you would think that the best part of the trip would be that we bought a gorgeous house that is 40% larger than our current house. actually, the best part was finding that iowa city has an honest-to-god brewpub, old capitol brew works. just one, but that beats the shit out of our current home, which is surprisingly uncool for being a large college town. unfortunately, 85% of the undergraduates here are sheltered yuppie scum from the chicago suburbs, good little republican larvae all, whose entertainment demands created a fasinating local market where one can choose from dozens of smokey bars playing shitty caucasian dance music while drinking $12 martinis.

the other 4 days of the two week vacation were spent driving. you might think this would suck, but it didn’t. prm and i pretty much spent the entire trip running our mouths and laughing our asses off, with the occasional stop to play with trogdor or trash a hotel room.

trogdor has now visited more states than any of his older brothers. he has also hung out at more brewpubs. and seen more sketchy truck stops. now, i’m all for breastfeeding whenever and wherever without shame… but i’ve recently discovered that there are places on this planet where i wouldn’t whip out a boobie if my kid’s life depended on it. seriously. when heroin-addled one-eyed truckdrivers are skittering aimlessly about the pavement in a miasma of human stench, the little shit can make do with kool-aid for all i care until we’re in a happier place.