here we are, 30 years old with 4 kids under the age of 8. both last night and tonight, we spent several hours in the back yard, hunting worms, chasing toads, caroming about the bounce house, and doing some hardcore chilling on the back porch, watching the sun set. we got all 4 dickheads bathed, teeth brushed, books read, homework done… after helping us clean up the toys in the living room, the twits were in bed at 8:30, trogdor at 9, and evilgremlin at 9:30. no whining, no yelling, no kids in our bed, no problems, just 4 happy kids, and a couple of hours to ourselves. (okay, i know that many of you don’t see kids in your bed as a problem… i’m old-school on this one. i like having a place where i can, for example, be naked with impunity, or watch movies like “tenacious D and the pick of destiny” without worrying about lines such as “i’m going to come in your ear-pussy!” being repeated to me over the phone the next morning by an indignant first-grade teacher.) surprisingly, it’s like that 9 nights out of 10. and we sure as hell didn’t hit the genetic lottery jackpot with a bunch of calm, naturally obedient children, which means we’re superhero parenting geniuses. it’s good to live in a small town, it’s good to have a big yard full of noisy, dirty boys, and most of all it’s good to have the sense to not get stressed out about the stupid shit that can leave some people sighing in exasperation for most of their miserable waking hours. we rock.
