PRM: what are you doing?
me: making you the most awesome salad ever for lunch tomorrow.
PRM: okay.
me: seriously. get the camera. so next time you tell me i never do shit for you, i can hold up this picture and be like, “SEE? NOW SHUT UP, BITCH!”
PRM: are those homemade croutons?
me: yep.
PRM: you’re giving me a food-boner.
me: i KNOW! get the camera.
the-most-awesomely-thoughtful-freakin-salad-ever-that-took-me-an-hour-to-make-late-at-night-in-my-pajamas-when-i-could-have-been-playing-guitar-hero-but-didn’t-because-i’m-martha-stewart-bitches-and-all-your-vegetables-are-belong-to-us contains:
romaine lettuce, carefully cut to non-annoying mouth-aperture size, to prevent flipping salad dressing on dress clothes (or, in this case, scrubs), as happens when trying to cram oversized pieces of lettuce into one’s mouth
radishes, sliced
carrots, julienned
grape tomatoes
cucumber, with the green peeled off in alternating stripes, so the slices look like little flowers. i’m not making this up.
avocado, sliced thin and rubbed with a lime wedge to prevent browning
a hardboiled egg, sliced
colby cheese, some organic crap from the food co-op that is the most awesome colby cheese ever and reason enough in itself to go back to the food co-op, julienned
deli roasted chicken breast, julienned
feta, crumbled
ranch dressing, in a separate tupperware to prevent soggy lettuce.
croutons, made from two slices of homemade-from-starter-sponge sourdough bread, cut into squares, sprayed with fake butter, sprinkled with onion powder, celery seeds, and garlic salt, dried overnight, toasted in the oven the next morning, and placed in their own separate sandwich baggie for maximum crunchy awesomeness at lunchtime.
also? i remembered to pack a plastic fork this time. now that’s love.
oh, and while we’re at it, here’s some refrigerator porn. i have to show you how FUCkING RIDICULOUS a side-by-side refrigerator is. tall, deep, narrow stacks of tupperware and shit threatening to fall over if you breathe on them wrong. and you can’t see squat. i hate my fridge.
so, yeah. have i mentioned before i freaking love food? we eat well around here. sack lunches always involve, at the very least, interesting sandwiches on homemade bread. dinner usually rocks. the kids are all learning to love to cook. it’s as much of a hobby as music is around here. so, more food-porn posts to follow! because i must tell you of my love of all things cheese. also, i have to tell you about the bacon porn!
